Recently I made a very big decision with my photography business, I decided to give it up possibly for good. Being a lifestyle and one day wedding photographer would have been living the dream; A good friend of mine told me “but once you come back from your missions you can probably do both!”
For me that wasn’t the point, I want to live totally submitted to God with absolutely no boundaries. If God calls me to leave what I’m doing for 3 years to do ministry/staff somewhere; that’s something I cant do if I have my own successful business to take care of back home. The question it ultimately came down to for me was “Am I gonna live half ass what God tells me to-Or am I gonna be selfish and pursue my own desires?” Doing photography for families and people was an absolute dream for me, I loved getting to know families & watching their babies grow up etc. and developing relationships with them but God also opened up my eyes. God opened my eyes to hurting people in the world and he spoke to me and said “If you aren’t willing to capture these people and share their stories, then nobody else will follow”
I would rather have the joys of God’s promise for my life, than live an ordinary plain life. There might be a day when God sees how hard I’ve worked and says “ok Chelsea, I’ve seen how hard you’ve worked dedicating your life for me… you can have start up doing portrait photography again” but I would be absolutely fine if he didn’t. The truth is after all the months of prayer I’ve thought about doing this, I could have been bitter to God all I wanted-I really could. I could have thought “God is taking away the desires of my heart and he DOESN’T care about what I really want.” But that’s not true, God NEVER asked me to make this decision it was one I made on my own.
God has put a cause on my heart that is so much more fulfilling than portrait photography will ever be for me, God has given me the opportunity to make the world aware of what is happening in the world. Working in a community and being a portrait photographer/building relationships is important; but so is photojournalism. It takes a very strong person to become a photojournalist, it is a profession that not everybody can do and a lot of people tend to crack in. You tend to ask yourself the question “is it right for me to just sit here and take a picture of this person without a tear on my face, and then go publish it?” Yes. Because you will change that person’s life for the better and you have far more influence than you can possibly imagine! God has put this cause on my heart, and for me it’s simply not optional NOT to do this school to learn more about him & human trafficking.
As in any profession, the benefits far outweigh the risks. The same goes for being a Christian/missionary. The decision to follow Christ and say “where you go I WILL go, I will serve you and follow you with all my heart, and all my life no matter who leaves me because of it or what happens.” It will be the most difficult decision you make, but the greatest & most fulfilling one of your life and you’ll never look back.
There will absolutely be days I want to give up and cry and say to God “God-I want an easy life. Why did you choose this for me?” and he’ll just tell me ‘Chelsea I love you and I created you for THIS purpose. I wouldn’t have chosen this life for you if I knew you couldn’t do this. I love you now SUCK IT UP’ Everything happens for a reason, and I know now and truly understand the verse
“Rev. 12:11 I overcome by the blood of Christ and the Word of my testimony.”
I will still continue to do portrait/lifestyle photography until July 20, 2011. After then I will be taking the time to re-connect with all of my friends/family before I leave for my DTS {August 5, 2011} Then I will be closing down my business for good. For me this is the end of 4 very long years of hard work and figuring out who I am not only as a person & but also as an artist. I’ve seen my photos go from ‘ok’ to good and something that people I don’t even know are willing and wanting to have done by me [which still blows my mind & astounds me!]
For me, doing this DTS is just the start of another journey of God showing me an incredible way he has planned for my photography and I can’t wait! I can’t wait to mentor others & sew into their lives the way that so many other photographers have sewn into mine [there are way to many of you to mention! But I am so grateful for each of you and the way God put you into my life!]
Lots of love & blessings
-Chelsea
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